March 25, 2010

Random thoughts

Who wants to be blind? Not me - no one does. But what does it mean to walk by faith and not by sight? I wish I could see everything. I want to see the end of the road. I want to know what's going on. If only I could see answers to my prayers. All this FAITH stuff is hard and heavy.

The Bible says that "we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Eph 6:12

But when your troubles always seem to come through one person, this is hard to believe.

If "so-and-so" was out of my life, then it would all be so much easier. We see this person. We see his actions and hear his words. Surely, HE (or she) is the enemy - the in-laws, the neighbor, the boss, even 'the government'...But no, God says that the real fight is not against a person - not against 'flesh and blood.'

Will I believe?

I take a big sigh, settle down in my chair, shoulders slumped. Am I not acting like a child?

A disobedient child? A rebellious child?

The picture is...

I can't see over the edge and my Father says, "Don't go there, trust me." "But I wanna see! I wanna see!" I stomp my foot and glare at my Father. "Let me see!" I demand.

Or maybe the picture is...

"I see it! I see the problem! Just put some more air in the tire and we can keep going." But my Father can see that there is a tiny hole in the tire and that no matter how often I fill it with air, the tire will always flatten. I continue to pump the air in and try to make it on my own...confident in the solutions I come up with.

George MacDonald says "A man's real belief is that which he lives by." The Bible says, "Faith, without works, is dead."

Do I believe in what my Lord tells me? Will I trust Him? If I trust Him, then I should demonstrate it by how I live...right?

The LIES. The INJUSTICE. The AUDACITY. Do you know what he did? Do you know what he said?

"Faith without works is dead."

I pray for him. I give him something to eat when he is hungry. I give him something to drink when he is thirsty. I forgive. I forgive. I put my trust in God and remember that my fight is not against flesh and blood. The Lord sustains me. I walk by faith, not by sight. Who am I anyway? Just another sinner, just like him...only I have a Redeemer and my redeemer lives. He walks with me and talks with me along life's narrow way. Wherever I am He is with me and He never leaves me...never.

I take a big sigh and settle down in my chair - Only this I am relaxed. There is peace and rest. I can't see, but He does.

5 comments:

  1. Mrs. Santos,

    Thank you so kindly for visiting me today and leading me to your blog and post today. It lines up with what the Lord has been whispering into my heart all week. Thank you for finding me and lifting me up at this time. The Lord knew I needed to hear from you. I thank Him. I just wrote in a note to a dear friend earlier this morning..."this faith thing is really hard sometimes...I want to do all that I can to help my husband, my family. But He is encouraging me to remain home." ...I've been struggling this week with trust and living by faith...wondering if the struggle is about Him wanting me to truly lay myself down, and believe. Right now I am going to keep waiting, listening, surrendering and living for Him.

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  2. I always remember you wanting to live in a meadow when we were kids. A beautiful grassy, meadow. Do you remember this about yourself?

    This verse reminds me of you and your life at present. "Sing to the Lord with thanksgiving... who makes grass to grow on the mountains". Ps. 147:7-8 Speaks as a metaphor to those tough trails and that treacherous journey of faith. Thanks for sharing sister.

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  3. Mrs. Santos,

    Oh, how I unfortunately relate to the "rebellious child" that you mentioned in your post. I've been going through a very difficult journey late, and for some reason, I am having difficulty with trusting the Lord with ALL my life (e.g., every single part). *sigh* Thank you for sharing this. I really need to take it to heart.

    ~Mrs. Lady Sofia~

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  4. late = lately in my last comment. Sorry for the typing error.

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  5. Fairmaiden~ I am so glad you were encouraged. God is good. Have you visited www.homeliving.blogspot.com?

    Luecks~
    Yep, we still love meadows over here. It's our FAVORITE thing when we go hiking or exploring to come across a little meadow.

    There is a place we walk up hills and through a forest that opens up to a big grassy meadow full of little white daisies. The edge overlooks the ocean.

    Mrs. Lady Sofia~

    Isn't the Lord such a perfect Father? loving us in our rebellion? He gently corrects us and leads us on. (but I am glad to know that I'm not the only one with a 'rebellious streak' :))

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